- Ben's arm is shattered into a thousand pieces like his heart. Nonagenarians warned about ice but not Welsh men in their 30s. Fell on ice sprinting to the car as running late for the cinema.
- Mike leaves buffers for such things – time buffers, snacks, safety equipment, different types of false necks (substitute rubber neck), convoy including an ambulance. Mike's cinema trips are expensive with a massive carbon footprint, big event in the local community, local children holding sticks with moustaches on as the convoy drives past. Often disappointing if no one breaks their arm, Mike does it himself painfully (Henry can't say anaesthesiologist). Menagerie of emotional support animals (Shetland to mega-pony, the sympathy tapir and the spicy commiseration leopard).
- Ben's arm was "obviously fucked" but didn't feel pain, Henry likens this to a shark attack and losing your legs (full moon prawn disco, breakfast chum bucket). Henry exposes that Ben's arm actually shattered at the sight of seeing $2 billion in relation to A***** , Ben has now grown a tail, expensive to dye. Ben thought of as the "third elbow" and the others are dependent on him.
- Mike reinforces this is not an episode. Bonus episodes on Patreon, back in March. Month off well timed for Ben to have some recovery before going back to jingle making. Henry says Ben should keep working and not make anything harder for his colleague Henry Paker, icy-badmo boots.
- Titanic parallels – Ben had hope and hubris, his bowels full of Irishmen, picked up by The Carpathia, compartmentalised elbow.
- Mike is going to spend his month off looking for the first crocus.
- Henry spending time with Nicholas Nickleby and Nicholas Lyndhurst, watching repeats of Only Fools and Horses and reading Barnaby Rudge.
- Not an episode. Have a great February don't think too much about how many Rs are in February. Henry's birth month, born on the second "Wed-nes-day of Feb-ru-ary". Henry spelling his name wrong in his Physics GCSE (Henry Cpaker), exams these days all done by Alexa. Henry makes confusing analogies for modern technology and pens / exam invigilators. Starbucks writing "Marc with a C" as "Cark". Back to talking about the "troublesome R" in February, leap letter. February is a weird aberration of a month. February is a lame month to be born in "cold, wet, grim, blissfully short".
- Just a snappy non-episode.