¶ Opening Chat
Heatwave in the UK- leading to Mike insisting you must shave the whole family, bushes, wild animals. Fire hazard of massive hair piles. Water has become molten. All apples are now hot cider.
Temperatures are actually about 27 C. All Beans acknowledge this isn't very hot to the rest of the world.
Party Lido:
Ben went to a lively lido with a party atmosphere to beat the heat. Upbeat pop music has been turned up to invigorate the tired parents. Ben is possibly an undercover lido inspector. Lido urine content discussed- clientele is either under 3 or an OAP.
Mood and topic of the music at the lido changed- to two songs about Homelessness and "Streets of Philadelphia" which is famously about the AIDS epidemic. Henry sings doobedoobedo then shifts to singing like the Police and implies the music was downbeat on purpose to get Ben to leave.
Swimming techniques:
Mike's all business swim soundtrack includes "Eye of the Tiger."Mike's flipper foot shape and swimming technique discussed.
Henry has a nice break after a length with an aqua hamper and a laminated Grisham. Henry's swimming technique and phlegm dripping off his body are discussed. Need to sieve after Henry swims as you might run across some ancient pottery shards.
At the end of a length Henry has a nice break and a float at one end but Mike folds up to coconut size then he unfolds, briefly making all the water levitate and circular rainbow appears which amazes all around.
¶ Topic Chat
Topic sent in by Phil from Baltimore. Discussion of The Wire.
Silvio Berlusconi- massive house contained an artificial volcano. Henry reads an article about it leading to a scathing series of jokes about Tony Blair and discussion of cacti, zoning permission for volcanoes. Berlusconi compared to Nero. Bunga Bunga.
Henry momentarily forgets the topic but continues to read the article once he remembers. The phrase "coup de théâtre"is mentioned and Ben uses that as a segue into a discussion of the live show at the London Podcast Festival in September 2023.
Pompeii- Mike went as a teen, guided tour emphasized the lascivious aspects of the site like wanking guy. Henry missed some of it b.c it was hot and he was sitting down. Not over 28C though.
The Romans propensity for the lewd is discussed. The movie Gladiator is brought up and the fact that to be historically accurate the characters should have been surrounded by willy frescoes and lots of dicks.
Ben has been to Pompeii and Herculanium exhibit which was was so lewd that it had a sign to warn the public. Ben makes a sly dig on the BM stealing artifacts. Huge statue of a man shagging a goat in missionary position. All Beans are shocked and confused so they look at photos of the statue online and it turns out one of the subjects is a faun.All pottery starts with dicks.
The statue is discussed- one half of the couple is propped up on a Banging Rock
The Beans all agree that Pompeii is a city of pervs that's why God decided to cover it all up with ash. Pompeii's victims bodies discussed- the Beans are unsure if the remains are still inside the plaster.
Kelly Vivanco's Show Art
¶ Emails
- 37:44 - Time email section starts
Richard is listening to the back catalog. In the episode Bicycles, Henry details being mocked by a child for his missing hair.
Richard wants to help Henry out so he sends the Beans the Bible quote 2 Kings 2 23-25.Elisha cursing small children who mocked him for being bald and 42 children are attacked by 2 She Bears.
Lisa's email about injuring her friend "Bob" during Blind Man's Bluff - he smashed his face in to a stone wall. All Beans agree that it wasn't Lisa's fault. But later on that summer, Bob collapses due to asphyxiation having been forced by Lisa to wear a blanket for a photo shoot.
Email from John who has been listening for a year and who didn't know that Sean Bean is an actual person and not a cartoon mascot. He only realized that he was a famous actor during a discussion of Paul McGann. Wonders if other Americans have this same misunderstanding. All Beans disagree and quickly list Sean Bean's famous roles and Henry reads the IMDB listing. Discussions of Sean Bean being amazing at saying "bring me a horse" and how different that is than bring me a Fiat 500.
¶ Jingles
- 19:17 Bean Machine
- 29:36 The Old Switcharoo
- 34:16 Lewd Content
- 37:44 Email jingle
- 50:11 Listener Bollock of the Week
- 53:24 Bollock Back
- 53:32 Patreon
¶ Bollockings
Listener Bollocking of the Week
Pete from Copenhagen- who claims to usually be very chill bollocks Ben (and Micro Bollock for Mike) for the statement that they went to Europe over the summer because the UK is part of Europe!
The Special Relationship/Atlantic Bridge is discussed. Geographically obviously is apart of Europe, Politically less so.
Henry is just too hot to argue about it.
Ben Reflecto-Bollocks to the fact that they obviously mean Mainland Europe.
¶ Notable Quotes
- "Hooves akimbo"
- "But of course, all horses are stick."
¶ Sean Bean Lounge
Tax Information BBQ
¶ Listener Theme Tune
Ben from Brehmen "Twangles and Chunks"